I promised that today I would find a better sue story than yesterday. Observe:

Title: What happened to my old life

Perpetrator: SkyBell
 
Sue-ness Level: classic - classically awful, that is

Book or Movie Based: Book

Summary: "When two orphans are brought to another world only to find out that they had been engaged to the sons of Morzan since birth, trouble stricks. MurtaghxOc EragonxOc SaphiraxThorn."

Full Name(s): Kyoto (yes, Kyoto) and Yuri (KKM, anyone?)

Species: Human girls

Appearance: Kyoto has "waist-length light blond hair" which she ties back into "a braid that reached her stomach and her bangs that stayed out of the braid reached her cheekbones"; her eyes are gold. Yuri's eyes are "ocean blue", and has "shoulder-length black hair".

Special Possessions/Awful Descriptions:
    ⁃    "Her and Yuri barely had anything. They had two pairs of clothes and very little or no money and Kyoto had a picture of her and her family.
    ⁃    "She [Kyoto] was wearing her best cloths and her favorite hair tie so she didn’t stick out in the crowd." Because no one will notice you walking around in your best clothes, right?

Special Abilities:
    ⁃    "The only skills they had were reading, writing and math. "
    ⁃    Orphan angsting and flashbacking skills
    ⁃    Will eventually become powerful magic users

Origin:  "Now it was Kyoto’s turn to explain. 'My parents were killed during a shooting and Yuri’s parents were teenagers but even when they could get her back, they never came.'" Actually, they are the daughters of another Foresworn dude, who were sent to Earth for their protection.


Connections to Canon: Angela, who owns a bookstore here on Earth hires them as her assistants after Solembum purrs at them. She then takes them with her back to Alagaesia by jumping through a mirror. They then fall out of the sky onto Murtagh and Thorn, who were having a nice chat. Murtagh knocks Kyoto up out, and Angela and Yuri run away. Kyoto runs away when she wakes up, and then Angela tells both the girls that " You have been engaged to the sons of Morzan since birth. You were brought to the other world for protection. I put magic on the shop so you would be attracted to it. Solembum would purr when he found the girls we were looking for. You girls could become some really strong magic users and you must do this marriage for it was promised in the ancient language."

Notes: This one is really worth reading in its entirety - only two chapters long (just a baby!) and full of Suey goodness. The author's note for the first chapter contains the memorable sentence: "Murtagh betrayed Galbatorix and ran off with the 3d dragon egg." Awesome! I want a 3d dragon egg! All the other ones are boring 2d or 4d - no fun at all. Also, now that I look at this closely, it seems like troll material. Oh wait, the author does seem serious after all.

Hello minions! Sorry for the very prolonged absence, but my arms almost completely gave out on me (weak tendons and muscles) in January, and I'm only now getting to the point where I can do a little bit more than just schoolwork.

During my hiatus, we were visited by a **TROLL**, which was terribly exciting. Check the comments for my entry on "Bothering Alagaesia" to get the gory details. I will now be screening all anonymous comments, m'kay?
Oh, here's a bit of troll fodder for your enjoyment: "SATURNINA AND HILARIA ARE -REAL- PEOPLE. THEY ARE THEMSELVES, -NOT- SUE-ENHANCED. GO TO HELL..."

Today's sue is nothing particularly special, but look for more exciting entries in the future.

Title: The Other Murtaug

Perpetrator: Sheila the Crazy Tank
 
Sue-ness Level: so bad...that it's almost funny

Book or Movie Based:  I can't tell. Probably book-based?

Summary: "Murtagh always knew he would meet his equal. Maybe they are more alike than in skill. Slight OOC. Plus an OC."

Full Name(s): Murtaug. Creative naming skillz? I think not.

Species: Human thief

Appearance: " Her short black hair stuck to the side of her face and her yellow eyes dart back and forth"

Special Possessions/Awful Descriptions:
    ⁃    Black leather pants that hurt when she runs; a black shirt and black leather vest complete this creative ensemble
    ⁃    A blue dragon egg that causes her to be chased by denomination-less soldiers and the Ra'zac (apparently, the empire has already been defeated in this fic; thus her being chased by Galbatorix's minions because of the egg makes no sense at all in this context)
    ⁃    Awesome thief skillz - she's been one for seven years, so she must be really good.
    ⁃    a "soft voice"
    ⁃    Can make Murtagh talk like an immature 13-year-old at times

Special Abilities: To be generally bland and coma-inducing.

Origin: None as of yet.

Connections to Canon: She and Murtagh have something that is either supposed to be chemistry or a drug-induced haze. Obviously they are meant for each other, what with all their clever dialogue and/or witty banter.

Notes:  I really wanted to find a nastier sue, but I got lazy. Let's hope for a better one tomorrow.

It's looking like this journal may become a weekly updated affair, as school and other extracurricular activities are keeping me plenty busy. I hope this story makes up for my long absence.

Title: Ma beauté observée bleue de minuit  Does anybody here know French? I couldn't tell you what this meant if my life depended on it, and I don't trust online translators.

Perpetrator: Sakura evil twin of Sango
 
Sue-ness Level: *retches*

Book or Movie Based: Book.

Summary: "After the battle in Surda. Oromis takes Eragon to the Celestial lands for training where he meets other Dragon Riders. Better than it sounds. Please read and review! I'm beggging you! InuYasha Xover."

Full Name(s):  Lady Sakura, Yasha, Kira, Lie, and Aki. These are just the OC!sues. Read the excerpt for canon character mangling.

Species: Dragon Riders/Demons/Whatevers

Appearance:

• Lady Sakura: "had black hair midnight blue eyes, pale skin and was wearing a cerulean dress."
• Yasha: "had silver hair, golden eyes and was wearing a red dress."
• Kira: "had silver hair, golden eyes and was wearing a red dress."
• Lie: "blonde hair and green eyes"
• Aki: "red hair and green eyes"

Special Possessions/Awful Descriptions:
    ⁃    Lie and Aki have Dragons! named Isis and Everist. I'll spare you the pain of their descriptions for now. Yasha and Kira are Dragon riders, too, but their dragons are either dead or invisible, as they're not in the story yet.
    ⁃    Magic
    ⁃    Awesome warrior skills

Special Abilities: To mangle the Eragon canon beyond recognition.

Origin:  Lady Sakura is Naraku's daughter. Yasha is the daughter of Inuyasha and Kagome. Kira is Kikyo's daughter. Apparently, Kikyo and Naraku reproduce asexually. Lie and Aki have yet to be given an appropriate past.


Connections to Canon: Eragon is getting trained in all sorts of awesome things by Naraku and Inuyasha, thus he will have lots of interaction with the sues. Galbatorix wants the sues captured.

Notes:  There are no words to describe this monstrosity.

Title: Bothering Alagaesia

Perpetrator: Emerald Tiara
 
Sue-ness Level: eurgh

Book or Movie Based: Book.

Summary: "Saturnina and Michelle go to Alagaesia and annoy the crap out of everyone... when two girls from 2006 meet two guys from Alagaesia, you know some crazy stuff is gonna happen."

Full Name:  Saturnina (actual name = Grace) and Hilaria (actual name = Michelle)

Species: Human.

Hair: not described

Eyes:  Not described.

Markings: None

Special Possessions/Awful Descriptions:
    ⁃    iPod
    ⁃    cell phone
    ⁃     Eragon books

Special Abilities:

• Not really a special ability, but they are taking Latin in high school. That's where they got their fake names alter egos.
• Eragon fangirling skillz:  Saturnina asks Eragon to marry her the very minute they fall into Alagaesia.

Origin:  They're both normal, high school, Eragon-obsessed young ladies. They get sucked into Alagaesia during an after school meeting of their book club.


Connections to Canon: They fall out of the sky right in front of Eragon and Murtagh, who are off to rescue Arya in Gil'ead. Saturnina asks Eragon to marry her - they both get interrogated by  Saphira.

Notes:  I really dislike these kind of humor stories - where random girls fall into the story and confuse the canon characters. Not that I don't appreciate a wacky sense of humor, but it's just not appropriate for the story.

( Brownie Points to the Sues for not wanting to change the plot  )

A later post than normal for today, I think. I was busy this morning. Just a heads up for my minions: I will be going back to school next Tuesday, which in my case means that the semester Finals are about two weeks away. Consequently, I might not be able to post a Sue every day. Please be patient with me, and I'll try to make it up to you by giving you extra bad fics, m'kay?

On to the sue:

Title: Eldinor

Perpetrator: prettybella
 
Sue-ness Level: meh...bad. Nothing too exciting or original here, although Murtagh is occasionally IC in the beginning.

Book or Movie Based: Book.

Summary: "tafter eldest. Galbatorix has arranged a marriage for Murtagh as a punishment and to teach him selfcontrol. While exploring the castle, Nira meets someone and the chance to escape unfolds. okay so i am bad a summaries, this is my first fanfic. please R&R"

Full Name:  Nira

Species: Human.

Hair: "long, brown hair"

Eyes:  Not described, as far as I read. Which wasn't very far. I'm tired, and it's a kind of blah story.

Markings: None

Special Possessions/Awful Descriptions:
    ⁃    A sword and accompanying battle skillz
    ⁃    a cruel father
    ⁃     pod people friends
    ⁃    magik skillz

Special Abilities:
Magical abilities: she knows the Ancient Language and uses it. As a good bonus, however, she mentions being drained by the spellcasting - something I've rarely seen in a Sue. Galbatorix probes her mind and pronounces her to be very talented.
Warrior Skillz : "I am the best swordsman in the city. No one has been able to beat me. I now if I was to face a rider or and elf I would quickly loose the fight, but for now I lie my power." Yeah, okay.

Origin:  She's a Princess. She was raised in "Tierm" by one of Galbatorix's lackeys.


Connections to Canon: She is arranged to marry Murtagh, even though he wants to marry for love, and it's hinted that he's attracted to Nasuada. Aside: she has to go to live in the great city of "Uru'bean." Teeheehee.

Notes: I spotted some nasty tense changes in here, and the first chapter switches between Murtagh and Eragon's points of view as indicated by such words (I use the term loosely here) as, "EPOV," and ,"MPOV."

( Nira's Warrior Skills! Special Guest: Nate, the pod friend. )

Today is again an MOC day, and this one's so bad I almost feel like calling troll. I'll let the readers decide. It has two sues for your reading enjoyment.

Title: Era

Perpetrator: blackphoenixfireraven
 
Sue-ness Level: *attempts to supress gag reflex*

Book or Movie Based: Book? Movie? This author cares not. Apparently, the book.

Summary: "takes place after second book. Era grew up without knowing her real parents. now her foster parents are dead. So Era must go into the world and find hope, family, magic and a strange red stone.MurtaghOC" *gigglesnicker*

Full Name:  Era. She has a Sue friend named Yuaza.

Species: Human.

Hair: Era's only description: " a female version of the Murtagh in the movie but skinnier, with a lot longer hair"  Yuaza: "brown hair"

Eyes:  Yuaza: "brown eyes"

Markings: Yuaza: "tan skin" even though she's never let out of the house unless Era is with her. Maybe her parent's own a tanning salon?

Special Possessions/Awful Descriptions:
    ⁃    Era: "she was found with was blood red gem the size of a chicken egg on a chain of gold"
    ⁃    Era: pride "She could stay with townspeople but it wouldn’t be right. She had to much pride to live like that and worse they would make a girl out of her, making her feel useless and wearing a dress. Era could not deicide which was worse, the dress or uselessness."
    ⁃     Both: horses and tack
    ⁃    Era: dead foster parents and a burnt house
    ⁃    Yuaza: Controlling parents
Special Abilities:

• Both:  Amazing battle skills. See today's sample for the barf-worthy details.
• Yuaza:  sorcery/teaching skills "when Era was busy doing boring stuff Yuaza spent her time in her room that was a library of books. Yuaza had taught Era how to read, write and even to speak some of the ancient language. Though no one knew other than Era Yuaza had a talent for magic, she was a sorceress. Yuaza had never told her parents about it because they would fear that she would hurt herself with her power."

Origin: Well, Yuaza's parents loved each other very much... Era is, liek, five times more mysterious though: " Because her parents had no sons she was raised as a boy. Actually her parents had no children, Era herself was adopted. Her parents had found her on the side of the rode sixteen years ago. She never knew her real parents, all she was found with was blood red gem the size of a chicken egg on a chain of gold and a note that read this is Era, raise her well keep her from trouble."

Connections to Canon: None yet.

Notes:  Wow. Just wow.

( Sues with Swords... )

I'm tired. Today's sue will hopefully be relatively short and horrible. I saw the following 'disclaimer' and knew this one had to be featured.

"Disclaimer: Of course I'm not Chrstopher Poalini! I'm only a girl who has decided to wreak havoc upon Alagaësia by changing the books...So read on!" Hoo boy.

Title: Adurna's Dragon

Perpetrator: Vixen Hood
 
Sue-ness Level: No. Just no.

Book or Movie Based: Book

Summary: "Adurna, a young girl from Teirm, has spent most of her life not knowing her mother, only knowing that an evil man that worked for the Empire murdered her. But when Adurna finds a dragon egg, will she be able to avenge her mother's death?"

Full Name:  Adurna. Minions  - guess what her name means in the Ancient Language and win a cookie!

Species: Half Human/Half Elf

Hair: "a long strand of black hair"

Eyes: "crystal blue eyes"

Markings:  None.


Special Possessions/Awful Descriptions:
    ⁃    Her own personal...composer? Wtf?"She, herself was very attractive, with pale skin and a tall, lithe composer."
    ⁃    An animal Familiar: a hawk named Evandar - she converses with him because she has mind powaz - apparently, he's "worse than Solembum." She also has a horse named Shadowstar. Poor horse, he gets called an "over sized deer."
    ⁃    A dragon egg which she literally stumbles across while hunting deer. Aw, just like Eragon. "Adurna dug it out of the ground, holding it in her long fingered, and delicate hands. It was magnificent. It was about a foot long, and was white in color with lines of gold spiraling across it." This sounds familiar - I'm pretty sure I've read another Sue story where the dragon egg was white and gold.
    ⁃    A bow and arrows
    ⁃     A job at the local tavern
    ⁃    A grasp of the Ancient Language. Her mommy taught her before she died.
    ⁃    A dragon, which, surprisingly, comes out of the egg she found. "The dragon had glittering white scales, and as it started to lick the membrane of its wings, she saw its wings were gold, as were its spikes and claws." Poor dragon - those wings must be awfully heavy. Later, he gets the name "Vanilor." Switch the 'l' and the 'n'  - what do you get? Valinor! Ooooh! Just kidding.
    ⁃    A book called, "Dragon Rider's of Old" Nice.
    ⁃    A blade named Aiedail. More about this in the "Origin" section.

Special Abilities:
    ⁃    Tavern Wench skillz - NO RLY - she got enough tips from her work at the bar to be able to afford Shadowstar, the "over sized deer."
    ⁃    To dream about Eragon and Saphira. NOT IN THAT WAY U SICKOS. GAWD. </CAPS OF DOOM>
    ⁃    To recieve the Gedwey Ignasia and not pass out.
    ⁃    To live in freaking Teirm and have nobody find out about her dragon until Eragon, Brom, and Saphira come along.
    ⁃    Insecurity. So the author tells me. "But as you might have realized, earlier in the chapter, Adurna had been comforted by the thought that the dragon had hatched for her. This shows she is insecure and this is among her weaknesses. " Other weakenesses will be revealed later on. If there's one thing I really don't like, it's this slow revelation of flaws. Some people can do it well, but I've seen few who can.

Origin: I'll let the Sue and Dragon Rider's tell you: " 'One of the most famous of rider’s blades belonged to the Forsworn, Morzan, who was first and last of the Forsworn. He named his sword Zar’roc, or Misery, and it served to it’s propose, causing the end to many riders and dragons alike. There were many other blades as well. One of which belonged to a rider named Faena, the only female and the only elf to be in the Forsworn’s ranks. Her sword was called Aiedail, and her dragon Faun. She to brought just as much destruction to the riders'...That was her mother. And Aiedail was her blade. Adurna’s blade."

Connections to Canon: Sees Eragon and Brom arrive in Teirm. Jeod takes them to her tavern, and she just happens to be the serving wench on duty. Saphira and Eragon find her and her dragon later, because Saphira senses a male  dragon's presence. The sue and her dragon refuse to join up with them, and Eragon and Saphira just leave them. After she gets attacked by the Empire, she decides to join up with Brom and his crew.

Notes:  This story contains a memorable Sue line, "...her dreams were troubled with shadowy figures and a cold, snake like voice that kept saying, 'Join me or die!' " Her dragon has a gem of his own, though: "Let me finish. I love very much Adurna. If you were a dragon, I’d take you as my mate, but you are not, so I must be content with protecting you from harms way." Wow.

 

Title: Emerald Concerto

Perpetrator: GideonNoir
 
Sue-ness Level: Meh...it's bad. Of course, anything after the previous sue seems tame.

Book or Movie Based: Book

Summary: "Set after Eldest. Galbatorix sends Murtagh to find the next rider, a seemingly impossible mission. What will happen he finds her?"

Full Name:  Alexander. This is a Sue with a masculine-gendered name.

Species: Human

Hair: "her warm chestnut hair fell in soft waves around her face and hung to her shoulder blades."

Eyes: "The warm light found sharp, mint-green eyes that gazed out from a pale face with proud, elegant eyebrows." also, "The girl’s keen eyes never stopped moving, catching every detail of the forest around her"

 
Markings:  None.


Special Possessions/Awful Descriptions:
    ⁃    A mandolin: "It was teardrop-shaped mandolin, dyed a deep, dark red." From the author's note: "Alexander’s mandolin’s shape is called an A-model, and they generally have a sweeter, softer sound than the more common F mandolins."
    ⁃    "her lean body to rid her muscles of the night’s stiffness. The ever-shifting morning light played along her body, revealing her features. Her flat chest and narrow hips gave her a boyish look, despite her thin waist."
    ⁃    Murtagh's interest - not clear if they will fall in love yet, but I'm guessing they will.
    ⁃    "she buckled on her narrow belt that held her long knife in a simple sheath"
    ⁃     A stalker. NO RLY. His name is Mendhem, and she kicks his ass with her powaz.

Special Abilities:
    ⁃    Musik skillz: "You’re that famous musician from Galbatorix’s court, Alexander… the youngest Royal Musician and the best bassist and mandolinist in Alagaesia...She had been made a Royal Musician at the age of fourteen, a huge honour for a musician of any age. The Royal Musicians were chosen by Galbatorix himself to play at his court after intense competitions. Alexander remembered the competitions. That had been the That one so young as Alexander had been chosen sent waves of disbelief through the realm, and she’d had to prove herself repeatedly to the other musicians. As a result, she was now one of the lead musicians of the court." And of course, Galbatorix just lets her go where she pleases, right?
    ⁃    To touch other minds - specifically Murtagh's
    ⁃    To be a possible Rider candidate for the third dragon egg
    ⁃    "he couldn’t pull the knife out, not one-handed. The blade had buried almost two-thirds its length into the tree. That Alexander had thrown the knife so powerfully with such precision with not even a heartbeat’s space of time to aim was a very disquieting thought."

Origin:  Her parents were merchants, and they of course were mean to her when what she did wasn't best for business. This included arranging a marriage between her and Mendhem. They were killed by bandits.

Connections to Canon:  Was Galbatorix's Royal Musician. Murtagh found her during his search for the third Rider.

Notes:  This writer's prose could rival Paolini's for its purple-ness.

I found a doozy for the second one. Sharpen your sporks, my minions.

Title: Two Hearts into One

Perpetrator: PiNaYsKaTeGuRl
 
Sue-ness Level: *whimper*

Book or Movie Based: Movie

Summary: "Eragon finds his old childhood friend again...soon, she and Murtagh start to fall in love with each other. What obstacles stand in their way from being together? MurtaghxOC. Seventh Chapter up! Please read and review!"

Full Name:  Aya

Species: Human

Hair: "She had black hair at medium length which was tied halfway and swung whenever she walked."

Eyes: "Her brown eyes showed a lot of determination and lonliness."

 
Markings:  None yet.  


Special Possessions/Awful Descriptions:
    ⁃    A bow and arrows
    ⁃    Eragon's frienship
    ⁃    Murtagh's Garret Hedlund's lust
    ⁃    CAPSLOCK OF DOOM   

Special Abilities:
      ⁃    To apparently be horrible at aiming bow and still make a living off hunting
    ⁃    To make Eragon a Pod Person
    ⁃    To make the Ra'Zac OOC (as in completely harmless and dim-witted) Yes, the Ra'Zac are OOC.

Origin:  She knew Eragon when they were both children.

Connections to Canon:  She runs into Eragon and Murtagh, who are on their way to the Varden, as she flees the Ra'Zac (Arya and Saphira are conveniently absent). She shoots Murtagh in both arms, mistaking him for a deer. Miraculously, he can still fight and kill the Ra'Zac, with her help, of course.

Notes:  The sheer WTF-ness and blatant disregard for canon in this story astound me. I have the urge to yell, "OUT, OUT, DEMONS OF STUPIDITY!" at my computer.

 

I came back from Christmas, and behold, my minions friends were flirting having a grand old time in the comments. Excellent work, guys.  Now go make babies, I mean, listen to what I've got to say.

Today is a very special day  - I owe you gus three sues - one for every day I missed. And guess what? Today is a MOC day! Are you ready for the onslaught?

Sue #1: Danielle!

Title:  Blazing Heart This one is complete, and there's a sequel.

Perpetrator: -xoxo LoveMeForMe xoxo-
 
Sue-ness Level: Aghhhh...It burns us, precious, it burns.

Book or Movie Based: Book

Summary: "Her life changed the moment she was given a silver polished stone, before she knew what was going on, she found herself tied with evil darker than she could have ever imagined. R&R please! MURTAGHOC and I am proud to say, COMPLETE!"

Full Name:  Danielle Serena Rashi

Species: Human

Hair: "Danielle had long red hair that hanged till her thighs"

Eyes: "She had a pair of hard and cold brown eyes. It literally wants to make you freeze up the second you look into it. There was something weird about her eyes, it would flash red every time she gets angry, sad or frustrated. It was like some kind of mood detector."

 
Markings:  A Gedwey Ignasia by the fourth chapter.   


Special Possessions/Awful Descriptions:
    ⁃    A random sword.
    ⁃    A silver dragon, which she names, "Kahiro."
    ⁃    "Danielle was tall and lean. She had a great body with great curves, courtesy to the days she spent in the gym working out. She was unusually pale and incredibly beautiful. She was pretty strong and fast, again thanks to the time she spent working out."

Special Abilities: "Her dexterity had increased thanks to the amount of archery she did. Her strength and agility also increased a great deal for living this kind of life. The only thing that didn’t change was her appearance. She still looked the same. Even though she could feel the strength flowing in her veins, she didn’t seem to grow any muscles of any kind. It was all together quite unnerving."

Origin: Her parents died when she was little. She lives in New York illegaly - as in alone -she's sixteen, but has an ID that says she's nineteen. She works in a bar.

Connections to Canon: None yet (this is by the fifth or sixth chapter), but something tells me Murtagh will have the hots for her. *eyeroll*

Notes:  English is not the author's first language, I think. She has quite the angsty profile, too. Oy, this story, though - if you can read the whole thing you're braver than I. I've gotten to the fifth chapter, and while there are 'anvil-sized hints' that this is Alagaesia, this could just as well be a very bad original fic.

 

I'm giving y'all a link today in keeping with the Christmas Spirit (tm): Christmas Carols for the Disturbed!

Oh yeah, and there's a Sue for today as well.

Title:  Things We Go Through 

Perpetrator: rorykins
 
Sue-ness Level: Okay. Sometimes she's pretty annoying, and other times I find myself enjoying the fic. It's the first one I've managed to get all the way through.

Summary: "Aishlinn's parents were killed in an Urgal attacked, and ended up in Carvahall. Becoming friends with Eragon, what will happen when something happens that could either make their friendship stronger or break it. Chap 3 up!" Here we go again...

Full Name:  Aishlinn

Species: Human

Hair: "Aish's long, tangled hair had been pulled back into a pony tail, with a leather strap holding it up"

Eyes: Not described.

 
Markings: None.   


Special Possessions/Awful Descriptions:  A bow and arrows. The ability to "spar", which was gained though "sparing lessons".

Origin: Her parents were traders. Their caravan was attacked by Urgals when Aishlinn was nine, and her parents died. She managed to escape and ended up at Brom's house.

Connections to Canon:  Brom raised her. Eragon is good friends with her. No signs of romance yet, praise the Lord.

Notes:  This is another 'book and movie based' story. However, this author seems to have found a good balance between the two sources, unlike our last Sue - she's good at playing by many of the rules.  She says she wants to improve her writing, which is always a good sign. 

( Durza vs. Sue - Who will Win??! )

I was greatly amusing by the ninja!romance picture someone posted yesterday, so I set out for the Pit in search of a very amusing sue for y'all. Sadly, my five second attention span and a lack of good Sues on the first page prevented me from finding anything too spectacular. Sorry.

But guess what I did find! A  "sue-falls-into- Middle Earth - Alagaesia" story!

ETA: Realized that i didn't set up links to the story and author. Fixed now! Also, does anyone else find it really amusing when the mouse hovers over your own userpic and a box comes up saying, "this is you,"?

Title:  Eragon's Lover ZOMG for-shadow-ing!!1!

Perpetrator: quinthefikoso

Sue-ness Level: Meh...it's bad, but not terribly exciting yet. It brings out my inner snark.

Summary: "There is a new girl in Alagaesia that wasn't there before. She finds Eragon and she needs his help. This takes place in the middle of Eragon the book. movie&book based." Let me repeat: movie and book based. Famous last words.

Full Name:  Rowan

Species: Human

Hair: "Rowan tied her light blond hair back so it wouldn’t get in the way."

Eyes: "Her crystal blue eye searched her room quickly" Apparently, she is a cyclops.

 
Markings: None. Yet.


Special Possessions/Awful Descriptions: Many books: "A Great and Terrible Beauty, The Thief, Song of the Lioness Quartet" Her collection also includes a, "well-worn copy of Eragon" Big Surprise

Origin:  Our world. She gets sucked into Alagaesia through her copy of Eragon after wishing she could be there.

Connections to Canon:  Brom and Eragon almost run her over as they gallop around Alagaesia.   Eragon sees her, immediately becomes OOC, and stops to chat with her, even though they were fleeing the Ra'Zac. Saphira can tell that she is from a foreign world, but tells Eragon that the sue is ok. So of course, she gets to accompany them.

Notes:  Milder sue than yesterday, I think. Reader poll: do you want a good mix of ok sues and realy toxic sues, or are you all masochistic and in it for the pure badfic?

 

Today is MOC (pronounced: mawk) day  - otherwise known as Murtagh/OC day. It will be held on a weekly basis, ocurring whenever I feel like it.

Our second MOC is...just wow.

Title:  A Stealthy Romance This title made me think of hilarious fake ninja romances. teeheehee.

Perpetrator: h.I.stealth  smells like a self-insert already

Sue-ness Level: This is really up to the readers - I'm too busy laughing and crying at the same time to rate it. *snickertear*

Summary: "Arianna has always been a rogue, ambushing travelers on a beaten path. It's all changed when she happens to ambush Eragon and Murtagh with the awesome Saphira. She's taken on the journey of her life, full of tears, love and tragedy."

Full Name:  Arianna Have I mentioned how much I hate sues with no last names? Then again, no one in Eragon canon seems to have a last name. Bugger.

Species: Human

Hair: "a long river of blonde hair streamed out behind her like a golden banner, announcing her presence." It changes color a few sentences later and becomes, "amber locks."

Eyes: "brilliant hazel eyes"

 
Markings: "Her crimson lips against snow-white skin. When she was a little kid with her brother, Seth, the village children ahd always taunted her about how white it was. Now she was proud of it."


Special Possessions/Awful Descriptions: Lots of shiny, sharp knives. A bra. Leather clothing and a wool mask: "She had slipped into her comfortable leather and was now checkign her harnesses and sheaths for all of her blades. Most of them had been taken, by Murtagh undoubtly, but the cleverly hidden ones were still there. Like the one hidden in her bra." *eyeroll* She also has speshul titles: "The Grove Reaper" and "Shadowstalker". Bwahaha!


Origin: "She was born a thief, is living as a thief and will die a thief." The end. I think sues reproduce asexually - just split and divide or something. This sentence is one of the worst tense changes I've seen in a long time.
 
Connections to Canon:  OOC!movie!hawt!Murtagh lusts after her. Saphira befriends her - seems to almost prefer her over Eragon. *headesk* movie!Eragon...is stupid - he seems to be some sort of foil for the sue, making her look extra smart. Eragon and Murtagh take off her clothes whe she starts to overheat as he result of wearing leather and wool in what is apparently summer. She slaps them when she wakes up, then goes off and bathes in the forest where perverted!Murtagh watches her. Stupid sue.

Notes:  This is the author's first fanfic. Beware the purple prose. That is all.

 

( Read more... )

 

Well, I never expected so many friends after being plugged by pottersues  , but I suppose she's just magic. Thanks to all of you for friending me, and I'll try my best to make this journal enjoyable.

I've found y'all a very speshul sue for today - Rune, self insert!sue extraordinaire that reeks of pepper jack cheese.

Title: Daughter of Earth and Sky - "abbreviated" DoEaS

Perpetrator: KittenofShadows eurghh...

Sue-ness Level: Toxic, toxic, toxic.

Summary: "Rune, daughter of an elf and a rider, has always remained hidden in her castle, untouched by sorrows. But after fleeing to the Varden, she realizes that maybe the world isn't so perfect. Takes place after Eldest." After reading this, I thought, "Well, at least she's read the books." That knowledge only made it harder for me to read this story, I only got to the second chapter.

Full Name: Rune.

Species: Half Human/Half Elf

Hair: "A breeze blew her auburn tresses away from her face" I pictured long chunks of hair floating away on the breeze here.

Eyes: "Her wide, green eyes glittered with curiosity about everything", "Rune’s eyes were sad. They didn’t glitter"


Markings: None, yet, but from the sounds of it, she will become the third dragon rider - thus meriting her a Gedwey Ignasia.

Special Possessions/Awful Descriptions: "Ilian, her cat, snoozed on the made bed behind her. The tortoiseshell tabby stretched, opening her mouth in a wide, sleepy yawn" Ilian = "happiness" in the Ancient Language. Apparently, Galbatorix's third dragon egg is hers. she's named the baby dragon inside, "Slate." Poor dragon.


Origin: I'll let the author tell you how it all happened: "Once there was a young Rider, long ago. One day, he met an elf maiden, an ambassador from the elf queen—her youngest sister. He took one look at her in all her beauty, and knew that one day she would be his,” Murtagh took a deep breath and continued, “Her name was Lycona. That Rider grew up to be Galbatorix. Lycona was all but forgotten. Then, about fifteen years ago, the Ra’zac found a spy lurking around Galbatorix’s castle. When they brought the spy to him, who was it but Lycona, the beautiful elf who had rejected him years before. Instead of executing her, he kept her in his castle. Lycona hated him. She loathed him with all her heart. When she found out she was with child, she fell into deep despair. When you were born, she tried to send you away, to her sister, the elf queen Islanzadi. But Galbatorix caught her, and made sure she would never attempt such again, for he knew her real name and could bind her to his doing. Next, she tried to send you to Brom. Once again, she failed. She died of a broken heart."

Connections to Canon: She's the daughter of Galbatorix and an elf!sue. Murtagh is in love with her (she cries into his tunic in the second chapter). She lusts after book!Eragon.

Notes: On the author's profile, she describes herself in purplish prose: "I'm not interested in stalkers, so I think I'm fairly safe describing myself. I've got dark hair and green eyes with long lashes. My eyes have grey rims around the irises, which in the middle ages supposedly showed you had second sight. Unforunately this has yet to do me any good. I'm pretty enough, but not in an obvious way. You've gotta look at me a while to notice it. I've sort of got an elfish look (minus the pointed ears, unfortunately), with a solemn face and paleish skin that doesn't burn but takes forever to tan. Kinda vampiry...And short. Definately short." And laughable. Definately laughable.

This is the first of four stories, all of which describe the adventures of our wayward sue. I'm afraid this author is too far gone for anything to do much good.

 

( She has even made book covers for her first two stories... )

Tonight, we have our first definite movie!sue. I went onto the Pit, and this was just screaming,"Pick me! Pick me!!1!1eleventy!"

The author is only fourteen, but this does not excuse her character from being one of the most nauseating I have ever read. I don't think she's read the books.

Title: Entangled Dragons

Perpetrator: Mrs.Mercer500

Sue-ness Level: Toxic

Summary: "A 5th egg has fallen into the hands of a daydreaming farm girl from Carvahall, and she and Eragon meet and befriend each other not knowing their destinies as Riders and...Lovers." *headesk*

Full Name: Arielle

Species: Human

Hair: Not described.

Eyes: Not described.

Markings: None, as of yet, but I'm suspicious that she'll soon have a Gedwey Ignasia to show us all.

Special Possessions/Awful Descriptions: "a small ginger haired kitten with diamond blue eyes" Its name is Gysha, and it's the only living thing that understands her. Later on, she finds " large stone. The stone shined as a ray of moonlight came down on it. Arielle came closer, to find the stone was white with swerving golden lines." Foreshadowing, anyone? Also, she has "warrior skills." The author's description of said skills contains the memorable line, "Arielle didn’t really use violence so much, but she did when she wasn’t busy."

Origin: Apparently she just popped out of the ground, like so many sues do. She lives with an Aunt Cybil and an Uncle named...Henrico. Bwahahaha!

Connections to Canon: She lives in Carvahall. Sloan molests her. She meets movie!Eragon right after this and immediately lusts after him. I sense a disturbance in the force.

Notes: This is a very laughable sue, full of memorable lines. The best part is, it's only two chapters long. I have a feeling this particular author went and saw he movie, came back with her head full of, "ZOMG HAWT MANZ," and promptly wrote this story.

( Sloan was cutting up bloody pieces of meat that made Arielle want to bark )

Hooray, my first post!

In honor of this momentous occasion, I have found a special sue. She belongs to a ship that will, no doubt, become very popular: Murtagh/OC. Who doesn't want to melt the frozen emo-man's heart?

Apparently, no one does. Except for me.

Without further ado, I bring you...Alethea, the blind!sue!

Title: What is Blind

Perpetrator:invaderpixie Note: this is a joint account. Beware the power of two fangirl minds!

Sue-ness Level: Bad - almost toxic

Full Name: Alethea
Species: Human? Not clear.
Hair: Not described color-wise, but it is arranged by her maids later on.
Eyes:"glazed over silvery blue orbs", "silvery eyes" They sparkle, despite being glazed: "silver glazed that that had formed over her blue orbs"
Markings: None yet.
Special Possessions/Awful Descriptions: "She wore trousers tied down by bandages at her ankles, with a loose skirt tied off to the side. She wore a long sleeved blouse, going down to the bottom of her thumb and tied off at her wrists and the middle of her lower arms. Over which went a tunic, cut at the middle of her upper arm, and a sash tied around her waist. Most of the clothing was a shade of pale blue, reminding Murtagh of the color of her eyes" (These clothes are later reported to b special - Alethea needs them.)

"soft lips"

"long fingers"

"I sense power within you, but no like that of the ancient language. And yet, you have no barriers against your mind, or no other abilities that I can find"

Origin: None, as of yet. She lived in a "haven" before this - it was a perfect place where illusion and reality were blurred. *eyeroll*

Connections to Canon She heals Murtagh of an arrow wound. Galbatorix forces Murtagh to marry her. Emo!Murtagh does as Galbatorix orders not because the king will kill him if he doesn't, but because he lurves the sue. Naturally.

Notes: Apparently it is fashionable in this world to wear a corset. *headesk* As a civil war reenactor, I find any suethor's lack of knowledge about such articles of clothing increasingly ridiculous. It was not necessarily torture to wear one - I should know. And I would think it's pretty clear from Paolini's purple prose that his people dress in a fashion more suited to medieval times. Corsets should not exist.


( Sigh. The obligatory dressing of the Sue. )